Amore Magazine

Tiger Woods divorce is final. Elin has gone back to her maiden name, has full custody of the kids, and a massive bank account. Rachel Uchitel has reportedly told friends she would give up everything to get Tiger back. What exactly would she be giving up? Does she have a job, husband, or kids? It does not seem like much of a stretch to give up your hotel room and move in with the married man you had been sleeping with before National Enquirer had you busted. Just remember it was only a year ago we were all under the impression Tiger Woods was happily married. What have we learned? Don't always assume the manufactured family photos illustrate a happy couple.

Take a look at this blind item from Monday. My money is still on Ben Affleck, Jennifer Garner, and Blake Lively.

Crazy Days and Nights

August 23, 2010

Wow, don't tell Melanie Griffith about this one or Antonio will never have an inch of freedom. This former A list movie actor who is now a comfortable B+ has had some fidelity issues. Well, lots of fidelity issues actually. It seems his wife does not like him cheating on her and as part of the deal where she agrees to stay married to him he has a tracking device he carries with him so she knows where he is 24 hours a day. The thing is that she doesn't know is that half the time when it says he is in his production office or on set, it is actually his assistant who is holding the device and our actor is off somewhere still cheating. I could make this really easy and describe the wife and the co-star our actor has been sleeping with, but there needs to be a little challenge.

You may be asking yourself how this would be possible since you have seen so many pictures over the last two weeks of the Affleck family together. Ben Affleck's new movie opens September 10th. He will begin a press tour shortly and is aiming for awards season already. For someone who complains often about how intrusive the media can be about his home life he likes to put it on full display when he knows it will secure media interest in his latest projects. Jennifer is filming a movie with Russell Brand (a remake of the Dudley Moore classic Arthur) and all parties involved with the project bank on photos of her with Ben and her children to drum up further media coverage. I also tend to believe the recent sexual harassment suit filed against Ben's brother Casey has prompted him all the more to paint himself as a family man. But look at his face. He looks miserable. The only time I have ever seen him get excited is when discussing politics or The Red Sox. What's with the long face, Ben?

Can you imagine making your husband carry a tracking device? Imagine explaining that one to your drinking buddies? Is that a SCRAM bracelet, Bob? No, it's a tracking device my old lady forces me to wear. I can still drink, but I had to cut off the mistresses.

I don't want to know where my husband is at all times. In fact I find myself constantly suggesting Dan should go out with his friends. Don't you have somewhere to go? Leave me alone and let me watch Real Housewives. If you need your husband to carry a tracking device you need to ask yourself where it all went wrong.

-Kate Casey

Kate is a Pop Culture Lover. PR Pro. New mom. Comedy nerd. Celebrity gossip fan. Follow her on Twitter